It’s not unusual for new terms to pop up out of nowhere in the Black community. Social media has only made it easier to do so. `From ‘period’ to ‘no cap,’ our vernacular is rich and unique. Though some words are more troubling than others. More and more often, I hear the word ‘situationship’ being used by my peers. To them, it is like any other word they adapted into their vocabulary to use when the circumstance fits. However, it’s a trendy word at best and an excuse to not communicate at worst.

What is It / Where Did It Originate?

A ‘situationship’ refers to a relationship of sorts. It is more than a simple hookup but less than dating, similar to being friends with benefits. Because of its recent popularity, one would assume that it was created during the same time. It’s actually been used since at least 2014, but the concept existed before the term. This is depicted within Tina Turner’s popular song “What’s Love Got to Do with It” (1984). Her lyrics touch on the subject of separating commitment from relationships.

Why is It Problematic?

In the current era, hookup culture is running rampant. Social media is swarmed with people encouraging others to disregard monogamy for situationships or to cheat on their spouses all together. This sets a terrible precedent of hurt parties applying extra caution with labeling future relationships (if they choose to continue engaging in them at all). A toxic cycle of hesitation spreads, causing a wave of non communication and non commitment. More confusion and pain is inevitable because, by then, no one wants to voice what they’re expecting from the relationship for fear of ruining a good thing.

Takeaway

Like life, being in a relationship is a risk. It’s understandable to not want to be hurt, but rewards (healthy relationships) are just that because they require effort (risk) to earn. If a serious relationship is not the goal, it’s fine as long as both parties understand and are alright with it. Whether casual or serious, it is important to communicate instead of leaving concerns to fester. It saves everyone time and energy.